I want to just say a giant THANK YOU to everyone who read and commented on my post about getting out of the calorie counting trap of obession/addiction that I had finally accepted I was in, and recognized that I needed to escape. It was a secret I kept for far too long. As I very rarely get too personal on the blog, I felt so supported and was reminded of why this community can be such a great gift. Thank you also for sharing your own experiences and struggles, and your offers of support. Don’t worry, I’m still goofy ol’ me…but I will try to peak out from behind the witty wordplay a little more often.
I actually wrote that post last Thursday, but it took me awhile to get up enough gumption to post it. It was easy to write, but difficult to post. I couldn’t sleep the night before worrying about it! For today, I thought I would share with you what I ate my first day of not tracking my calories.
Without further ado, I present to you, Jenn, and all of you supremely supportive friends through blogging, What I Didn’t Calcul-Ate Wednesday.The closest thing to a fruit or vegetable my body desired when I woke up Friday morning was a Carrot Cake Vitatop. Crumbled up on my proats and drizzled with homemade Maple Roasted Peanut Butter–which hardened up a bit by the time I got to school and consumed it–I’m pretty sure this might have been the best flavor combination I’ve come up with in awhile!
The truth is, I had a VERY good idea of how many calories were involved in that breakfast. Since I eat the same ‘base’ of oatmeal, oat bran, TVP, and protein powder almost every morning, the ‘numbers’ have become rather ingrained. The Vitatop blatantly advertises how many calories it has, so there was no denying that.
Lunch was a bowl of Roasted Red Pepper, Grape, and Tomato Vegan Bisque, with an assortment of other side items to choose from. [What can I say? I never know what I’m going to be in the mood for. :)] I went with the veggies, Raw Kale Artichoke and Cannellini Spread, and two slices of Ezekiel Flax Bread (which is the perfect texture for dipping).
Oatmeal is my favorite post-school, pre-workout snack. It fills and fuels, but doesn’t mess with my stomach while running, so it is not uncommon to find me standing by the staff lounge microwave around 3:00 PM heating up a blend of oats, oat bran, flax seed, and TVP…sprinkled with the cinnamon I keep stored in my lunchbox.*
*For cinna-mergencies. Obviously.I really wasn’t hungry, and I was a bit carb-out for some reason, but I knew I needed to fuel myself before running, and I also really wanted any excuse to spoon peanut flour goop into my mouth.
Again, I was still very aware of the general amount of calories I had consumed so far that day. I also knew that post-run, I had probably burned almost all of them away.
I felt weighed down, though, so I made a giant salad monster, topped with one of my favorite combinations: nutritional yeast, Trader Joe’s Mediterranean Hummus, and the Santa Barbara Mango Peach Salsa from Costco.
That was just course number one. Course number two? A bowl ‘cho’ fun!*
*I love Chobani puns. In case you haven’t noticed on Instagram.
I have told y’all this before, but one of my favorite things to do late at night, when I’m home alone….
…is make nut butter.*
*What did you think I was going to say?
The light of day revealed I had made not only plain coconut butter, but vanilla cinnamon, carob, and lemon ginger versions as well.As you can probably imagine, I did have to have a late night snack. When I went to visit Brittany, I was shocked to discover that we both had the habit of mixing our hemp protein with applesauce…and cereal. It is a light, tasty bedtime (or post-bedtime) treat.So that’s it. If I said it was easy to stop counting calories, I’d be lying. My mind still fights the urge to not keep a mental running tally. I’m trying to just eat and enjoy, and not worry about knowing (or NOT knowing) the numbers.
I’ll get there. I know.