Alert the media! Call off the cancer crusaders! I have solved the skin-killing dilemma of tanning bed aficionados worldwide!
And now, you too can have a healthy golden glow, all year long!
Yes, Jenn, and all you pale, winter-hued fans of What I Ate Wednesday, it is time to put away your self-tanner. I will show you how to reap the rewards of excessive beta-carotene and discover yourself to be naturally (vitamin) a-glow even in the horrible depths of sometimes sunless winter.
This 24-hour diet plan will allow you to infuse orange into every meal of the day!
Of course, to prepare your intestines for all the produce, you should start the day the ACV way–orange flavored, obviously.
Make sure your lunchbox contains carrots. Looney Toons? More like LIE-ney Toons. Bugs definitely should have been tinted with a warm shade of orange.And if the Soup of the Week can’t help you out–sweet potatoes and kale are vitamin A and carotene all-stars–I don’t know what will.
Don’t forget to take advantage of your afternoon snack: Two-Minute Pumpkin Mousse is vegan, and faux tanner friendly. [It also will help to balance out your complex carbs with a bit of protein. ]
(You might, however, want to warn your roommate before breaking out the immersion blender at 6:30 in the morning to make the aforementioned tofu-and-pumpkin treat.)
If nothing else, make sure you stock up on winter squash.
If you can pile it on a salad with blink-and-you’ll-miss-them orange bell peppers, well, all the better.
Blackening BBQ seasoning, nutritional yeast, and raspeberry pineapple salsa might not be orange, but elementary art did teach us that mixing red and yellow makes a lovely shade of orange. [And the Sabra Tuscan Herb hummus is so darn addictive that even if it weren't conveniently golden, you should include it in your turn-me
-on-orange diet anyway.]And you defnitely should not neglect the opportunity for infusing some orange overtones into your second dinner bedtime snack.
Follow this plan, and you too can receive concerned looks from your principal as to why your hands appear as though you’ve cast a warm photo filter on yourself.
Glow, little glow worms, glow!